Irish Alzheimer's

Murphy showed up at Mass one Sunday and the priest almost passed out when he saw him. He'd never been to church in his life. After Mass, the priest caught up with him and said, "Murphy, I'm so glad ya decided to come to Mass. What made ya come?"

Murphy said, "I got to be honest with you, Father. A while back, I misplaced me hat and I really, really love that hat. I know that McGlynn has a hat just like mine and I knew he came to church every Sunday. I also knew that he would have to take off his hat during Mass and figured he'd leave it in the back of the church. So, I was going to leave after Communion and steal McGlynn's hat."

The priest said, "Well, Murphy, I notice that ya didn't steal McGlynn's hat, after all. What changed your mind?"

Murphy replied, "Well, Father, after I heard your sermon on the Ten Commandments, I decided that I didn't need to steal McGlynn's hat."

With a tear in his eye, the priest gave Murphy a smile and said; "After I spoke about 'Thou Shalt Not Steal', ya decided you would rather do without your hat than burn in Hell?"

Murphy slowly shook his head. "No, Father, after ya talked about 'Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery', I remembered where I left me hat."



(Posted on FB Saturday, March 27, 2010 at 9:12pm)

Happy St. Patrick's Day!

Here is some stuff I have learned about this day. I thought it would be nice to share it with "y'all"! :o)
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Who is St. Patrick Anyway?

According to the World Book, St. Patrick lived about 389-461A.D., and is the patron saint of Ireland. St. Patrick was responsible for converting the Irish people to Christianity. He became known as the Apostle to the Irish.
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Interesting info found in Wikipedia:

St. Patrick's Blue, not green, was the colour long-associated with St. Patrick. Green, the colour most widely associated with Ireland, with Irish people, and with St. Patrick's Day in modern times, may have gained its prominence through the phrase "the wearing of the green" meaning to wear a shamrock on one's clothing. At many times in Irish history, to do so was seen as a sign of Irish nationalism or loyalty to the Roman Catholic faith. St. Patrick used the shamrock, a three-leaved plant, to explain the Holy Trinity to the pre-Christian Irish. The wearing of and display of shamrocks and shamrock-inspired designs have become a ubiquitous feature of the saint's holiday. The change to Ireland's association with green rather than blue probably began around the 1750's.

Chicago dyes its river green and has done so since 1961 when sewer workers used green dye to check for sewer discharges and got the idea to turn the river green for St. Patrick's Day.

Tipperary Hill (section of Syracuse, NY) is home to the World famous "Green-on-Top" Traffic Light and is historically the Irish section in Syracuse. Saint Patrick's Day is rung in at midnight with the painting of a Shamrock under the Green-Over-Red traffic light.



(Posted on FB Tuesday, March 17, 2009 at 9:42am)

You’ve got to love the Irish…

An Irishman had been drinking at a pub all night. The bartender finally said that the bar was closing.

So, the Irishman stood up to leave and fell flat on his face. He tried to stand one more time; same result.

He figured he’ll crawl outside and get some fresh air and maybe that will sober him up.

Once outside, he stood up and fell on his face again. So he decided to crawl the four blocks home.

Again, he fell flat on his face. He crawled through the door and into his bedroom... When he reached his bed he tried one more time to stand up. This time he managed to pull himself upright, but he quickly fell right into the bed and is sound asleep as soon as his head hit the pillow.

He was awakened the next morning to his wife standing over him, shouting, “SO YOU’VE BEEN DRINKING AGAIN!”

Putting on an innocent look, and intent on bluffing it out he said, “What makes you say that?”

“The pub just called; you left your wheelchair there again.”



The (Irish) Errand

McQuillan walked into a bar and ordered martini after martini, each time removing the olives and placing them in a jar. When the jar was filled with olives and all the drinks consumed, the Irishman started to leave. “S’cuse me”, said a customer, who was puzzled over what McQuillan had done, “what was that all about?” “Nothin’, said the Irishman, “me wife just sent me out for a jar of olives!”



(Posted on FB Thursday, November 19, 2009 at 5:45pm)