Pulled Over

John was driving when a policeman pulled him over. He rolled down his window and said to the officer, "Is there a problem, Officer?"

"No problem at all. I just observed your safe driving and am pleased to award you a $5,000 Safe Driver Award. Congratulations. What do you think you're going to do with the money?"

John thought for a minute and said, "Well, I guess I'll go get that drivers' license."

Judi, sitting in the passenger seat said to the policeman, "Oh, don't pay attention to him -- he's a smartbutt when he's drunk and stoned."

Brian from the back seat said, "I TOLD you guys we wouldn't get far in a stolen car!!!"

At that moment, there was a knock from the trunk and a muffled voice said, "Are we over the border yet?"





(Posted on FB Wednesday, March 24, 2010 at 7:42pm)

Policemens' Balls

A woman was speeding along a highway when she was pulled over by a State Trooper. The officer walked up to her window with his ticket book and asked, "Do you know how fast you were going, Ma'am?"

"I know I was speeding officer, but I'm late for a very important meeting and I'm in a terrible hurry. Please don't give me a ticket. My husband would be so angry. I'll do anything. I'll buy tickets to your Policeman's Ball," she said.

The Trooper looked at her sternly. "State Troopers don't have balls, Ma'am."

The woman stared with open mouth and raised her eyebrows at the Trooper, who turned bright red, put his ticket book away, walked back to his cruiser and drove off.




(Posted on FB Tuesday, June 2, 2009 at 9:45pm)