Thursday, April 1, 2010

Poor Planning

(from the Funny Pages web site- funnies.paco.to)

This letter came from a poor old bricklayer who had suffered an accident. He has been besieged with the bureaucracy of an insurance company in filling out the forms for a Workmen's Compensation claim. I would like to read to you a little bit of this letter that he wrote back to the insurance company.

"I am writing in response to your request for additional information. In Block 10 of the accident reporting form I put, 'poor planning', as the cause of my accident. You said in your letter that I should explain more fully, and I trust that the following details will be sufficient.

I am a bricklayer by trade. On the day of the accident, I was working alone on the roof of a new six story building. When I completed my work I discovered that I had about five hundred pounds of bricks left over.

Rather than carry the bricks down by hand, I decided to lower them in a barrel by using the pulley, which fortunately was attached to the side of the building at the sixth floor. Securing the rope at ground level, I went up to the roof, slung the barrel out, and loaded the bricks into it. Then I went back to the ground, untied the rope, holding it tightly to assure a slow descent of the 500 pounds of brick.
You will note that in Block 11 of the accident reporting form that I weigh 135 pounds. Due to my surprise at being jerked off the ground so suddenly, I lost my presence of mind, and forgot to let go of the rope. Needless to say, I proceeded at a rather rapid rate up the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming down. This explains the fractured skull and broken collar bone.

Slowed only slightly, I continued my rapid ascent, not stopping until the fingers of my right hand were two knuckles deep into the pulley. Fortunately, by this time I had regained my presence of mind and was able to hold tightly to the rope in spite of my pain.

At approximately the same time, however, the barrel of bricks hit the ground, and the bottom fell out of the barrel. Devoid of the weight of the bricks, the barrel now weighed approximately fifty pounds. I refer you again to my weight in Block 11. As you might imagine, I began a rapid descent down the side of the building. In the vicinity of the third floor, I met the barrel coming up. This accounts for the two fractured ankles and the lacerations of my legs and lower body.

The encounter with the barrel slowed me enough to lessen my injuries when I fell into the pile of bricks. And fortunately, only three vertebrae were broken. I am sorry to report, however, that as I lay there on the bricks in pain, unable to stand, and watching the empty barrel six floors above me, I again lost my presence of mind and let go of the rope.


(Posted on FB Sunday, April 19, 2009 at 7:26pm)

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